Big Bag o' Drugs

Well, it's really real. I'm actually getting my wisdom teeth out, one week from today.

And I'm getting scared.

I submitted my three prescriptions for the procedure (an antibiotic mouthwash for me to use prior and after the surgery, Valium and Vicodin) and picked them up this morning from the pharmacy. The tech handed them to me in a big drug bag, larger than a lunch bag. I carted it into work, so they wouldn't be sitting in a hot car all day, but it is so funny to me, this big bag o' drugs.

I have many worries, worries that swallowing the blood will make me sick to my stomach or make my Crohn's flare. I'm worried that I'll get dry sockets and have to get continuing treatment for them. I'm worried that the Vicodin will make me sick to my stomach the way that codeine does. I'm worried that I'll wake up during the surgery and not be able to tell him. I'm worried, most of all, that all this worrying will flare my Crohn's. What a mess!

Please pray for me, that strong reason will prevail.

Fact: I will be sedated with Valium, laughing gas, numbing agents and general anesthesia during the surgery, so even if I do wake up, I'll be too loopy to notice anything painful or uncomfortable.

Fact: Everyone swallows blood in their lives. The doctor doesn't think it'll be a problem, so why should I borrow trouble and worry about it myself?

Fact: Dry sockets are treatable, and they are not inevitable. I have endured a pain--TWICE--that a doctor told me is said to be worse than childbirth (small bowel obstruction). I think I can handle some dry sockets. (Sorry if this is too picturesque, I just think it's important for me to remember.)

Fact: My worries make things seem worse than they probably will be. I need to chill.