Quick update for my own sanity:
I'm five months pregnant with our second child--another daughter--and am experiencing active Crohn's since I got pregnant. I guess I was kind of hoping that the pregnancy wouldn't set it off again, but oh well. We'll survive.
Right now I'm feeling anxious because of the enchiladas I made tonight and the fact that the onion and green pepper weren't soft-cooked. They were crunchier than I usually do, and there was a fair amount in my serving. Lately it feels like everything bothers my gut. EVERYTHING. And my GI--whom I LOVE LOVE LOVE, for the record--said that there really isn't anything else he can do for me and if I start having serious issues again, he's going to refer me to the doctors and surgeons at U of C. Sigh. So I'm trying to lay low.
Memories of last pregnancy and the tremendous back pain I experienced for months, which we found out was redirected pain from the growing abscess in my abdomen are coming back. I'm scared something will happen again that will take me away from Baby B, like it did with Junebug. Those memories have such a hold and pull me into such fear. I want to keep giving them to the Lord.
I'm discovering that there are things I need to do to keep my body in working shape during this pregnancy. Chasing a toddler all day instead of sitting in front of a desk makes for different energy needs, and I want to take care of myself. For the record, here are those things I've learned so far:
1. Prenatal Yoga. I use a DVD I bought for the first pregnancy that is soothing and makes my body feel so strong and relaxed and well-stretched. It also seems to help digest my food in the evenings. I make sure to do it AFTER Junebug is in bed.
2. Drinking Fluids. I need to drink more fluids. I can tell I'm not getting enough just from all the Braxton-Hicks contractions I'm having already. I drink Crystal Lite lemonade to help get water but I want to be able to do regular water. I can only drink it ICE cold, usually with ice in it.
3. Napping. I need to nap when Junebug naps. I need that sleep more than I need the time to pay bills, etc.
4. Prayer Time/Bible Study. I need to do this.
5. Introvert/Alone Time. Ditto
Monday, November 29, 2010
Monday, January 25, 2010
Who knew?
Who knew that mere days after I wrote that last post, sweet Juni was born?
Who knew that five weeks after her birth, I'd be in the hospital for two weeks because of the mysterious back pain that I'd been experiencing since pregnancy?
Who knew that I'd have two fluke seizures while in the hospital, causing me to have to surrender my driver's license? Who knew I'd be without driving privileges until late August?
Who knew I'd be on steroids for eleven months and in the hospital again in August?
Who knew that I'd have a surgeon consult in September?
Who knew that I'd be off steroids Thanksgiving and have now been off them for two months?
Who knew that yesterday and today would be the first pain I've had since August?
God knew.
And He knows how He'll take care of me for whatever is to come. He knows my fears, my anxious nature, my depression, my despair over this disease. He has a plan.
But the pain today makes me frustrated. It's my period, and it's common for me to have a flare during my period. But other than that, I can't think of a reason to be having pain: I'm eating small meals (the TRUE secret to my success these past months), I'm dealing with stress, etc.
I think it has more to do with the fact that Crohn's does what it will, when it will, for no reason that we yet know. I can do everything right that I know to do, and it will still act the way it wants to. The Lord is the only one with true control over it. I would like to remember this verse during this time:
Who knew that five weeks after her birth, I'd be in the hospital for two weeks because of the mysterious back pain that I'd been experiencing since pregnancy?
Who knew that I'd have two fluke seizures while in the hospital, causing me to have to surrender my driver's license? Who knew I'd be without driving privileges until late August?
Who knew I'd be on steroids for eleven months and in the hospital again in August?
Who knew that I'd have a surgeon consult in September?
Who knew that I'd be off steroids Thanksgiving and have now been off them for two months?
Who knew that yesterday and today would be the first pain I've had since August?
God knew.
And He knows how He'll take care of me for whatever is to come. He knows my fears, my anxious nature, my depression, my despair over this disease. He has a plan.
But the pain today makes me frustrated. It's my period, and it's common for me to have a flare during my period. But other than that, I can't think of a reason to be having pain: I'm eating small meals (the TRUE secret to my success these past months), I'm dealing with stress, etc.
I think it has more to do with the fact that Crohn's does what it will, when it will, for no reason that we yet know. I can do everything right that I know to do, and it will still act the way it wants to. The Lord is the only one with true control over it. I would like to remember this verse during this time:
Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory. I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.
Romans 8:17-18